Where the fuck is home. Come sleep over this is no excuse. Oh btw are you remotely interested in Smash 4? It looks so fucking good can we make this a thing when it comes out?

I accept all of the above offers. When school starts again, I’ll be more available with my work/school schedule. :)

lifeatthezoo said: Why are we not hanging on friday nights?

</3 because i moved back home. :(

neilnevins:

nathanael-platier:

We freed them…but at what cost?

that ball wasn’t there to trap them

it was to protect us

tastefullyoffensive:

Animals With Unusual Fur Markings [bp]

Previously: Cats Sitting Like HumansBunnies Sticking Their Tongues Out

i just got the best new shirt. 

i just got the best new shirt. 

nunderwater:

kids that mix their play-doh colors are the reason global warming exists

(Source: andrewbelami)

(Source: internezz)

msfili:

Iron Gym works, folks.

happy hour.

happy hour.

politicallyincorrectwalrus:

i love the term “partners”
are we dating?
are we robbing a bank?
do we run a legal firm?
are we the dedicated detectives who investigate these vicious felonies and are members of an elite squad known as the special victims unit?
who knows.

blogger meets blogger irl. blogger drops off blogger at airport. goodbye blogger  arrabbierebbero.

blogger meets blogger irl. blogger drops off blogger at airport. goodbye blogger arrabbierebbero.

(Source: thepowergame)

semiotickitten:

apiratenhisprincess:

4ngelo:

theodorepython:

miami-tea:


The Defibrillator Toaster
My mom would be so annoyed… every morning I would run into the kitchen screaming “WE’RE LOSING THEM!!! BEEP BEEP BEEPBEEPBEEP!”
“DON’T YOU DIE ON ME, DAMNIT!!!  NURSE, WE NEED 12 CC’S OF CREAM CHEESE, STAT!!!”
He’s bread, Jim.
Time of deliciousness: 7:15 A.M
If we don’t restart his heart , he’s toast! 
JESUS CRUST.
JAM IT!
“Daddy’s in a butter place now, kids.”

I WASN’T EVEN GOING TO REBLOG UNTIL I SAW THE SHIT TON OF PUNS

HES BREAD JIM

JESUS CRUST

To pay my respects, Ill be sure to place a flour on his grave.

I need this.

semiotickitten:

apiratenhisprincess:

4ngelo:

theodorepython:

miami-tea:

The Defibrillator Toaster

My mom would be so annoyed… every morning I would run into the kitchen screaming “WE’RE LOSING THEM!!! BEEP BEEP BEEPBEEPBEEP!”

“DON’T YOU DIE ON ME, DAMNIT!!!  NURSE, WE NEED 12 CC’S OF CREAM CHEESE, STAT!!!”

He’s bread, Jim.

Time of deliciousness: 7:15 A.M

If we don’t restart his heart , he’s toast! 

JESUS CRUST.

JAM IT!

“Daddy’s in a butter place now, kids.”

I WASN’T EVEN GOING TO REBLOG UNTIL I SAW THE SHIT TON OF PUNS

HES BREAD JIM

JESUS CRUST

To pay my respects, Ill be sure to place a flour on his grave.

I need this.

(Source: secretsbest)

skittle-happy-matt:

merlwybs:

silumia:

i may have peed myself a little watching this

NOOOOO